


Feeling The Same Way

by DestielHardcoreLove, Swlfangirl



Series: A Tribute To Journey [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Age Difference, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Gen, M/M, Multi, Shy Castiel, Teacher Dean
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-19
Updated: 2017-12-19
Packaged: 2019-02-17 03:25:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,980
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13068111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DestielHardcoreLove/pseuds/DestielHardcoreLove, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Swlfangirl/pseuds/Swlfangirl
Summary: This is my tribute to my absolute favorite band.  Started with me listening to them while walking and coming up with this huge brain child.  Each song has a story and with each story will come it's own pairings and tags will be updated as the series progresses.Enjoy!





	Feeling The Same Way

**Author's Note:**

> Dean had no idea what was in store for him when he finally got to visit Sam at his fancy new college in California. He wouldn't change it for the world though.
> 
> Pairing: Castiel/Dean

 

* * *

_Opened my eyes to a new kind of way_  
_All the good times that you saved_  
_Are you feeling,_  
_You feeling that way too_  
_Or am I just,_  
_Am I just a fool_  
  
_When the summer's gone_  
_She'll be there standing by the light_  
_Once she's been to where she's gone to_  
_She should know wrong from right_  
  
_A new road's waiting, you touched my life_  
_Soft and warm on a summer's night_  
_You're the only one, the only one I love_  
_The lovely one, I'm thinking of_

 

Sam paced along the sidewalk, his arm lifting once again to check his watch.  His brother Dean should have been here by now.  They’d never been apart for this long before and it had been a very long school year without his big brother watching his back all the time.  At first he had hated that insisted on looking over his shoulder all the time but now that he actually didn’t have that, it felt weird.  Thankfully summer finally showed up and Dean had promised to come visit for the next month and a half.

 

“Dammit De-” he grumbled only to stop short when he heard the loud roar of Baby’s engine.  His mouth split into a huge grin and he waved his arms.  He could see Dean laughing, shaking his head but Sam didn’t care.  The second his brother was out Sam nearly tackled him, “About damn time!”

 

“Yeah, yeah...you’re such a drama queen, Sammy.” Dean said, squeezing that extra bit tighter into their hug. He’d missed the dork something awful, but he wasn’t about to say it. “Got here as quick as I could, man. California is not made for speeding, there are cops literally  _ everywhere _ .”

 

Sam laughed, wrapping his arm around Dean’s neck to pull him across the quad, “I know.  You hungry?” he asked.

 

“Dude, you kidding? I’m always hungry,” Dean grinned, an attractive couple headed toward them and he couldn’t help but twist his neck around to take a better look at the back view. He lets out a low whistle and raises his eyebrows. “Talk about the promised land.” 

 

Sam just rolled his eyes at him but Dean laughed and followed him toward the promise of food. It was good to have his kid brother back where he belonged. The last six months without him had been brutal but it was for the best. Sam didn’t need Dean and all of his issues, he needed healthy relationships with friends, boyfriends, girlfriends, whatever he didn’t care as long as Sammy turned out okay. 

 

They ate their fill of what Sam  _ said _ was pizza, though Dean thoroughly disagreed. They argued about the differences between California ‘pizza’ and an authentic Chicago pie, but it wasn’t bad food either way.

 

Dean groaned as he watched his stomach puff out a little further. “You might have to roll me outta here.” 

 

Sam snorted out a laugh, punching Dean in the shoulder as they left the small pizza shop, “C’mon, you gotta meet my roommate Ash and then my friends.  They’ve been dyin to meet my infamous brother,” he said.  There were a couple of people who called out to him here and there but Sam only lifted his hand in a wave.  The ones that he actually wanted Dean to meet were waiting for them on the lawn in front of the library.

 

“Where...oh there they are,” Sam said smiling, “Remember, don’t be an ass and start talking all loud at Eileen.  She’s deaf and can read lips,” Sam warned with a stern look.

 

Dean raised his hands innocently but planned to do exactly that now that Sam had warned him against it. When Eileen was standing in front of him, Dean had to admit she was cute.  _ Go Sammy _ ,  _ Go. _ When she smiled at him though he couldn’t find it in his heart to be a dick. So instead he screwed with his brother further by fluidly moving his hands and lips to coincide with the words he wanted to say.  “You deserve so much better than my brother...did he tell you he slept with a teddy bear until he was ten? True Story.” 

 

Eileen snickered, shaking her head and began to sign only to have Sam interrupt them, “Don’t listen to him, he’s an ass,” Sam said and signed at the same time.  It got him another one of her precious laughs that made him blush a bit.

 

“Anyway, Dean this is Eileen, that’s Ash, that’s Charlie and her girlfriend Dory, and...where’s Castiel?” Sam asked looking at each of them.  

 

“Probably got his nose stuck in a book again,” Charlie said with a shrug.

 

“Hi, I’m Dean. The obviously more handsome, more charming Winchester brother.” Dean said, waving to the group. He almost mentioned that this Casteel dude had one helluva weird name but decided maybe it was best to make a good impression on Sammy’s friends if he was gonna be sticking around for awhile. 

 

“Oh you definitely are.”  

 

Sam groaned, rolling his eyes as he turned to see Jo sauntering over, “Jo, gross.  That’s my brother,” he said.  She merely laughed, joining the others on the lawn.  It was then he saw Castiel very slowly walking over.  Nose stuck in a book just as Charlie predicted.  He chuckled fondly and ran a hand through his hair, “Castiel!  Yo, get over here!” he called out.

 

Castiel’s head perked up and smiled when he found his friends sitting in the shade.  There was another with them, someone he’d never seen before, “Hi,” he said once he was closer.

 

“Dean, this is Castiel.  Castiel, this is my older brother Dean.”

 

“Heylo,” Dean said, feeling his heart start to thump harshly in every pulsepoint. He’d never seen someone so beautiful. He swallowed hard before realizing what he’d said didn’t make any sense, heat snaking up his neck. It was some cobbled version between hey and hello but he’d gotten flustered at the last second. ‘I mean, hey…”

 

Castiel chuckled, “Hello Dean.”  Castiel locked eyes with the older man for a moment or two before looking away with a blush tinting his cheeks.  There was a scoff behind him that he was assuming came from Sam.  Ducking his face he moved to sit next to Charlie, letting her see which book he had in his arms.

 

Sam grabbed at Dean’s arm and yanked him to the side, “Please don’t,” Sam begged glancing over at Castiel.

 

‘What?” 

 

“Just...don’t be a dick okay?  Castiel’s sweet and a little on the naive side,” Sam hissed punching Dean in the shoulder.

 

“I didn’t do anything, I just said hey to the guy…” Dean said, though it felt a little like he was lying. Something inside him had changed in that moment and he couldn’t name it but he just knew he was different now. 

 

He fought off the nervous flutters in his stomach and turned back to the group, signing for Eileen as much as he could. One of the kids in his class last year had been deaf and she told him in no uncertain terms that she wouldn’t let his  _ neanderthalic “film” course stain her perfect GPA _ .  So signing had became a bit of a habit anyway. 

 

“So what are you party animals getting into tonight?”

* * *

 

Castiel rolled his eyes as the brothers got into yet another wrestling match on the grass.  Over the past couple of weeks he’d seen Dean and Sam in a variety of different types of bickering and rough housing.  It always resulted in Castiel rolling his eyes fondly and trying to ignore them in favor of trying to study.  Dean was everything and more of what Sam had described.  Some of which Castiel knew Sam had tried to tone down.  Such as Dean being the total player.  

 

He couldn’t explain why but everytime Dean stopped to check out a pretty girl who walked by Castiel’s heart clenched in his chest.  He barely even knew the guy but of what he did know (thanks to Sam) Castiel couldn’t help developing a crush.  It was stupid and in the end Castiel was surely going to have some level of heartache.  

 

“Dude get off!” Sam laughed shoving Dean away just enough to jump back on his feet, “I’m gettin some food,” he said grabbing up his wallet from the ground.

 

“He might be bigger than me now but the kid still has a lot to learn,” Dean grinned, only belatedly realizing it was just him and Castiel. The guy was a bit of a mystery and Dean had a thing for  _ anything _ he couldn’t pin down. Which of course, only furthered his already out of hand attraction to the guy. 

 

Still...he wasn’t one to give up easily. 

 

“Whatchya’ reading?” 

 

Castiel blushed a little and held up an old tattered book.  It was a collection of poems from all sorts of different authors but the content was mostly about love.  He was a hopeless romantic.  Reading the poems helped ease the loneliness he felt sometimes.  Biting down on his lip he gently closed the book and set it down on his backpack, “Sam told me you like to read as well?” he asked.

 

‘Yeah, I uh, I have some old favorites….but I’m not y’know  _ a reader _ .” Dean scratched at his cheek feeling slightly awkward. He didn’t want to give Cas some kind of impression that he was smart or anything. He loved his brother but the kid liked to brag a little too much and as much as he hated being pigeonholed with his looks, he knew it wouldn’t be fair to let the guy think he was on the same level as someone who was actually smart like Cas. 

 

“I teach a film studies course back at home, and I’m the baseball coach but that’s not really important,” Dean said, feeling the flush radiate down his neck. He was never this awkward when it came to people but there was something about Castiel that just seemed to keep him off kilter. 

 

‘I’m sure it’s important to the students that you teach,” Castiel argued, giving Dean a pointed look when the man tried to argue.  Castiel smiled brightly when all that came out of him was a scoff, “I’m serious!” he laughed shaking his head.  He was about to say more when his phone went off in his pocket.  

 

“Oh...not again,” he sighed heavily.

 

Dean scowled privately at the phone that had taken away Cas’ smile. He didn’t like to see the guy upset and his body language was practically screaming  _ Ugh _ .

 

“What is it? Anything I can do to help?” 

 

“Unless you know how to fix an old janky air conditioner then no,” Castiel grumbled dropping his phone back on the grass.  Him and his roommate Inias had both prayed that they could make it through the summer without having to call a stupid repair man.  It was too expensive and neither of them could afford it.  Not unless they wanted to live off of crackers and ramen for the next two months.  

 

Castiel rubbed at his face, knocking his glasses off as he groaned again.  

 

“Sammy’s got a toolbox back at the apartment, I can take a look at it if you want…” Dean said, turning his head away as he stood up, trying to hide a bit of the blush, or maybe he could blame it on the California sun. 

 

Castiel’s head snapped up and for a brief second panicked when everything in front of him was blurry.  He fumbled a bit looking for his glasses when they were gently pushed into his hands, “You mean it?  You’d actually do that for me?” he asked, yanking his glasses back on so he could see Dean clearly.  The man was smiling, a little color on his cheeks that had Castiel grinning a bit.

 

“Would you mind if we go now?  It gets unbearable in our apartment at night,” he said.

 

“Sure, I mean I can’t make any promises but you’d be surprised how handy I can be, c’mon…” 

 

Dean led Castiel toward the parking lot where his baby was waiting for him. He imagined that most of the students, Cas included, lived on campus. But he’d made sure to send enough money so that Sammy didn’t have to reenact the genie and the lamp “itty bity living space’ scene every day. 

 

Castiel happily followed Dean towards his beast of a car, making sure to text Sam as he sunk down into the seat.  Sam sent him a reply of a bunch of kissy faces that had his face turning a dark shade of red.  The moment Dean got in he shoved his phone down as if Sam’s message could easily be read.

 

“Thank you doing this, even if you can get it to work just enough for the rest of the summer I’d be grateful,” he said as the car came to life with a turn of Dean’s wrist.

 

“It’s not really a problem, Cas. I don’t know if you’ve noticed this but you guys still have a couple weeks left of classes and I’m kinda bored off my ass while that’s going on. I don’t really have anything better to do at the moment and I like getting my hands dirty. I’m a bit of a grease monkey, I guess.” Dean swallowed, trying and probably failing at not being blatantly obvious about his little crush. But he couldn’t really help it and if he could save Cas a few hundred bucks and some hack stranger being all up in his place, well Dean would do it in a heartbeat. “Usually I just get my kicks with baby but she’s in fine form, I made sure to double check everything before coming out here.”

 

“Well, it definitely shows how well you take care it-her, I mean her,” Castiel winced a little.  Sam had warned him about calling the Impala an it.  At first Castiel had laughed it off but the pride in Dean’s eyes had him feeling almost guilty for the small slip.

 

“It’s okay, I know I can be a little...weird about my baby but she’s...she’s special to me in a way that not many things are,” Dean said, shrugging off the vulnerability as quickly as possible by easing the volume up on the radio. They rode in silence after that, though it wasn’t uncomfortable, not for him at least. For a minute he worried that he’d been rude to Cas but the guy didn’t look nervous or guilty anymore, so Dean counted that as a win. 

 

He ran into the apartment and pulled Sammy’s toolbox out from behind the dryer, checking to make sure it had the most basic stuff which thankfully it did, one thing he’d taught the kid right at least. 

 

He climbed back behind the wheel and sat the box between them as a reminder to keep his hands to himself. Cas wasn’t some random person during last call at the local bar, he was different, and Dean didn’t want to ruin what little tendrils of friendship they’d found like he did with most things. 

 

“Alright, lead the way.” 

  
  


Walking into Cas’ place was like walking into a furnace, he didn’t know how the guy handled it if it got any hotter at night. ‘Whew you were not joking about it being a low rent sweat lodge,” Dean teased but immediately got to work. 

 

At first he was worried because the unit wouldn’t even turn on but the blank look he got from Cas when he asked if the breaker was flipped, gave him a little hope. He found the panel and it was flipped but even after he switched it back on the air wasn’t really coming out despite the hum of the small engine. 

 

As soon as Dean took the facing off the unit he saw another problem. It was probably a sign that he was too invested when he sighed in relief that it would be an easy fix. He took the filter out and cleaned it, making sure to be extra thorough. Then double checked that there wasn’t any other problems before reassembling it. 

 

He grinned when he turned the thing back on and cool air began to blast out at him. 

 

Castiel had been in the kitchen making some sandwiches for lunch when he heard Dean’s shout of victory.  He grabbed up the glass of water he had prepared for Dean before walking into the living room, “Did you-oh,” Castiel gasped, the glass slipping from his fingers at the sight of Dean without his shirt on.  His sun kissed skin was damp with sweat and suddenly Castiel’s throat was very dry.

 

“Yeah, it’s working again...should cool things down here pretty quick, but I’ll help you get those windows shut. We don’t wanna let the cold air out,” Dean said, not even looking over his shoulder. The last thing he needed was another image of Castiel with his thin tee shirt clinging to his chest. Dean had nearly brained himself with a screwdriver the last time he caught sight of it. 

 

“That’s...that’s amazing, thank you!” Castiel said quickly looking around for a towel.  He quickly cleaned up the mess, hurrying back into the kitchen to refill the cup.  His heart was hammering in his chest while sweat began to gather in his hairline.  He just wasn’t so sure if it was the heat now.  Seeing Dean without his shirt for the second time should have been less shocking now but it was still as mouth watering as the first time.  Castiel licked at his lips as he stepped up to Dean’s side, ‘Here,” he said, wincing a bit at how raspy his voice sounded.

 

“Thanks man,” Dean said, taking the water gratefully. He was sweating a bit, California heat in the summer was no joke and a small apartment with no airflow for what was probably at least a week, meant Dean felt like a baked lasagna. He greedily drank the ice cold water and moaned at how good it felt against in his dry,parched throat. 

 

Dean stood in front of the air vents a little longer, enjoying the cool breeze on his skin before he realized he was still shirtless. He pulled the tee out of his back pocket and threw it on, not making eye contact with Cas. Dean figured either way he was screwed. If the guy happened to like what he saw, he’d be just another hot sweaty body...and if he didn’t, well Dean didn’t want to know it. 

 

“Just needed to clean the filter and flip the breaker back on...if uh, if it gives you any more problems all you gotta do is ask or Sam’s decent with a wrench and a screwdriver, I taught him most of what I know and I’m sure he wouldn’t mind helping you out.” 

 

Castiel bit his lip, Dean words barely registering as he watched mournfully as the shirt settled back into place, “Th-Thank you.  It means alot that you’d do this,” he said taking the cup back.  For one brief second their fingers grazed the other.  Castiel sucked in a breath and nearly dropped the cup again but managed to get control of it quickly.

 

‘I uh, I made lunch if you’re hungry?” he asked rushing back into the kitchen before Dean could answer him.

 

Dean stared at Cas’ retreating back and felt a little bewildered. The guy was odd, in an adorable way but it was almost like he was nervous or something. He shook it off and followed him back through the small apartment living area. “Y’know I don’t mind helping out. I told ya it’s not like I’ve got a lot goin’ on but if you’re... _ busy _ I don’t have to stick around or anything.”

 

“Oh, I’m not busy.  I only have one more final to study for really but I’m pretty confident that I’ll pass it,” Castiel said with a shrug, “It’s not much but here,” he said handing Dean a paper plate with a simple peanut butter and jelly sandwich.  

 

“Dude are you kidding me? PB&J is a classic, it’s awesome thanks.” He took the plate with a wide smile feeling a little bit embarrassed. It had been a long ass time since he’d tried so damn hard and he thought maybe he was overdoing it just a tad. 

 

Dean took a bite and held a low moan in his throat as he chewed and he was finally free to talk again. “So what are your plans for the summer? You going home to family or...maybe someone you left back home?” 

 

Castiel huffed out a laugh even though his cheeks turned pink, “I-I don’t have anyone.  I’ll be staying here probably.  Get a part time job and take some classes to keep from getting bored,” he said.  Castiel took up his own plate, joining Dean over at the table.  

 

“Yeah, me either...but I have a few friends back home so it’s not terrible. I think my limited experience with actual relationships is pretty much flashing neon lights screaming  _ not for you, Dean _ ,” he chuckled, feeling a little forced but he didn’t wanna ruin the moment. Cas was a cool guy and if they could be friends, Dean really didn’t wanna mess that up. “What about after school, any plans or just playin’ it by ear?” 

 

Castiel bit his lip, wanting to ask what Dean meant by his relationship comment but decided against it.  He ran his fingers through his hair a few times, humming a little, “I really want to be an English teacher.  Middle school.  One of my favorite teachers helped me fall in love with literature and I hope one day I can do the same for someone else who is...you know, a little bit lost.”

 

He glanced up at Dean’s face, giving him a shy smile before getting back up to throw their now empty plates away, “Would you like something else to drink?”

 

‘Nah, I’m good...teacher huh? Gotta say, it’s not at all what I expected but it’s got it’s perks. Pay isn’t one of them, but the kids aren’t half bad,’ he said teasingly, taking a small drink of his water. 

 

“I uh, it took me a bit longer to get at it than it would for most people. I was trying to raise Sam, work full-time and only did night classes whenever I could.” Dean shrugged a little, he hated this part people usually saw him as some kind of hero but they didn’t understand the life he made for his brother wasn’t really that great, but they survived it and he guessed that was what really mattered. “It really helped that I qualified for some heavy scholarship dollars, I don’t think I’d have been able to do it without it. Hell, I’d probably still be workin’ at Uncle Bobby’s shop.” 

 

Castiel smiled softly, sitting back down, “Sam told me how you took care of him, made me a bit envious to have a sibling,” he laughed a little, “Only child syndrome.  What’s your favorite thing about teaching?” he asked resting his chin on his hand.

* * *

  
  


Sam came into shared living space of his apartment and shook his head at Dean who was completely passed out, feet still on the table.  Summer break had officially started and even though there were no classes to take up his time, he and Dean found other things to do.  Going to the beach, playing pool, catching up on movies.  They even managed to drag Castiel out to a frat party.  Sam did feel bad though, Castiel was all kinds of nervous and stuck to Dean’s side like freaking glue.  

 

“Dude, wake up,” Sam said knocking Dean’s feet off the table, “We’re having game night here tonight.”

 

“Huh?” he popped up still a little tired. He hadn’t meant to nap but he’d stayed up late texting Cas..the guy had to be an insomniac, or a bat or something. He blinked himself awake a bit more as his brain tried to register what Sam had said to him. 

 

“Game night?” he mumbled once he was at least a little coherent. Then, like always,  “What do you need me to do?” 

 

“Um, if you’re feeling generous you can get us some beer?” Sam asked, already knowing what his brother was going to say.  The glare he got was an answer enough and he chuckled, “Just kidding jerk.”

 

Dean considered himself a pretty funny guy but with what they went through with their dad, getting drunk should be about the last thing Sam wanted...that’s how it was for him at least. He could have went that way maybe, if he hadn’t had to make sure Sam was fed, had school clothes, had some semblance of normalcy after their dad was gone. 

 

But by the time Sammy was gone and he was on his own, Dean quickly realized he had enough of a life not to want to throw it away. 

 

He let the irritation roll off him, not wanting to ruin the mood. “Who all’s comin’ over? You need me to go pick up some food, or groceries or whatever? I could make something…”

 

“Nah, we pulled some money together and we’re gonna order pizza,” Sam said, “But if you wanna make some of those awesome cookies that’d be cool.  Oh yeah, Charlie, Dory, Jo and Ash are gonna be here.” 

 

“Is uh, is Cas busy or something…?” Dean asked, knowing he was an utter failure at being nonchalant about it. Still...he couldn’t  _ not _ ask. 

 

Sam eyed Dean but let it go, “I tried messaging him but he never answered me back,” he said with a shrug, “I’m gonna shower.”  Sam playfully kicked at Dean’s feet before heading towards the bathroom.

 

Dean bit at his lip. If Sammy couldn’t get an answer he didn’t wanna add any pressure. Hell, hopefully the guy was getting some damn sleep. Still, he couldn’t help but be a little disappointed.

 

He made his way to the kitchen checking the supplies, apparently  _ someone _ went shopping for baked goods. So either Ash was fueling up for some pot brownies or Sammy wasn’t nearly as sly as he pretended. 

 

Shaking his head a little Dean chuckled to himself and got to work. 

 

As time drew nearer for everyone to show up, Dean’s resistance started to drain out of him. His phone seemed to be mocking him with it’s silence. He’d never really cared this much and while that scared him, apparently it wasn’t enough to keep his hands from pulling it from his pocket and shooting off a text. 

 

_ Message to Cas:  _ If you’re not too busy, you should swing by..

 

_ Message to Dean:   _ If I can get out of work on time I’ll try to come by.

 

He was surprised to find the message sent right back. It warmed him up a little that even when Cas wasn’t answering Sam he still made time to send  _ him _ a quick reply. Hope began to spur in Dean’s chest and he swayed along to the music in his head as he pulled the last pan of cookies from the oven. 

 

It was enough. 

* * *

 

Castiel ran up the steps towards Sam’s apartment, his heart racing with each step.  Somehow he’d managed to get everything done in time to rush home and take a quick shower.  There was laughter and some other loud noises coming through Sam’s door and he smiled.  He loved game night and hated that he almost had to miss this one.  He tried to knock but just ended up pushing the door open anyway.  There was quite a few people there that Castiel didn’t know but he raised his hand in greeting at the ones he did know.  

 

“Cas!  Didn’t think you were gonna come bud!” Ash said squeezing Castiel’s neck with his arm.  Castiel shook his head, looking around until he saw Dean on the couch.  The smile widened only to fall completely when he also noticed Jo practically sitting in Dean’s lap, her hand on his knee as she whispered in his ear.  Dean threw his head back laughing and Castiel’s stomach dropped like he’d been punched.

 

“Oh hey Cas!” Sam called out.  Castiel swallowed hard, trying to control his face but Dean’s head snapped up and Castiel bolted, running out the way he had come in.

 

“Shit,” Dean said, half jumping out of his seat and flinging Jo’s arm away from him as he went. He hadn’t even noticed it there but something wrong settled in his gut telling him that Cas sure as hell did. 

 

“Cas wait!” he called out, though he figured the guy probably couldn’t hear him. Still he took off toward the street hollering after him like a crazy person. 

 

‘Cas please, just..just wait for me.” 

 

Castiel tried to ignore Dean’s voice.  Why did he care so much anyway?  There wasn’t a chance in hell that someone like Dean would be interested in some shy awkward nerd like him.  Castiel swallowed hard and shook his head.  God he was an idiot.  This stupid crush was going to be the death of him and the end of summer couldn’t come fast enough.  There were loud footsteps coming up behind him and he finally stopped, keeping his back to Dean as the older man caught up with him.

 

“Cas, oh thank God,” Dean said, huffing his breath out in heavy pants. ‘I did not want to run barefoot through traffic…”

 

When no laugh came, Dean felt himself stiffen. 

 

“Look...I-I didn’t notice okay, I know it sounds stupid and it’s not really an excuse, or at least not one that works but I’m kind of, I flirt naturally..it’s not even something I have to try at. But it doesn’t always mean anything…”

 

Castiel winced, his throat closing up at Dean’s words, “O-Oh, it’s...it's’ whatever Dean.  You didn’t have to chase me down for that but thanks...I guess,” Castiel spat out, his eyes watering and burning with the effort to hold it back.  He marched around Dean, his arms wrapping around himself tightly.

 

“Wait...what?” Dean asked and then realized what he’d done and groaned. “Nooo just.. Stop I’m doing this all wrong. Cas what I meant was that I wasn’t  _ trying _ to flirt with Jo. I didn’t even realize she was so close until I stood up and she half fell off of me.” 

 

Dean reached out for Cas, gently catching his arm. “You..you’re different. I’m not smooth, not suave or charming. You make me- you make me nervous, Cas.”

 

Castiel stared up at Dean and rolled his eyes, “Me?  Really?  Dean...I know I’m naive and all but…” he sighed heavily and rubbed at his face, nearly knocking his glasses off, “Please don’t do this,” he whispered.

 

Dean balked, a little angry but more hurt. “Hey now, I’ve never claimed to be innocent or anything but I’m not some kind of predator. I may not know much about the relationship stuff but I’ve never been with  _ anyone  _ who didn’t wanna be there or didn’t know the score, Cas.” 

 

Castiel blinked a few times, his mouth dropping open a bit, “That’s...that’s not what I was saying,” he let out another sigh, steadying himself, “Look, you’re an amazing guy Dean.  Whether you believe it or not, you are.  And I might have had a crush on you before you even got here and it just grew the more I actually got to know you.  I’m just Sam’s weird, awkward friend who’s never even had a boyfriend before…there’s absolutely no reason for you to be interested in me.  Like at all.”  It took a huge effort to finally close his mouth after everything spilled out.  His cheeks burned and he forced out a laugh, “I’m...I’m just gonna go now.  And die probably,” he mumbled, looking around trying to figure how the hell to get home.

 

Dean didn’t let him get far, reaching out and pulling him back tight against his chest until those deep blues were staring up at him in shock. Dean’s hand cupped Castiel’s cheek and he felt something fluttery and warm ramp up in his stomach. “Can I kiss you, Cas? I’m not..I can’t make any promises right now but I’d really like to kiss you.” 

 

“As long as you can promise me that this isn’t some joke.  That you’re not doing this to be cruel,” Castiel said, his chin trembling a bit.  His heart wouldn’t be able to take it if this was some prank Dean was playing on him just because he could.  Castiel couldn’t help digging his fingers into Dean’s shirt, nearly clinging to the man as he prayed that this was actually real.

 

Backing away a bit, Dean felt his heart clench. “I wouldn’t do that Cas. I wouldn’t…” 

 

Dean tried to cover his hurt but with the almost pitied look Cas was giving him he wasn’t sure it was working. Still, he put on a smile that he knew didn’t quite reach his eyes and eased himself back a little. “I think maybe I need to do a better job of laying some groundwork here. So...instead of this, be prepared to be swept off your feet Castiel Novak. Because I don’t half ass romance and you are in obvious need of some courting.” 

 

Dean was actually starting to feel better as plans began to form in his mind and he held out an arm at Cas’ side with a genuine smile. “Would you like some companionship on your walk home? Or we could always go back to Sammy’s, your choice.” 

 

There was a deep swoop in Castiel’s stomach and found himself smiling a little.  He wasn’t sure if the was the flash of hurt he saw in Dean’s eyes or the sudden change to  _ courtship _ either way the weight on his heart lifted.  A small part of him wanted to go back to game night and apologize for overreacting to the whole thing but a much larger part wanted to be alone with Dean.  Castiel moved closer, his arm draping through Dean’s, “I’d love it if you walked with me but I’m not ready to go home just yet,” he said softly.

 

“As you wish,” Dean said with a hidden smirk. 

* * *

 

For the first time in a long time Dean felt the string of something holding him down that wasn’t Sam. He knew he had to go back home, had to get back to work so he could make sure Sam was taken care of but part of his heart, a big part, clenched at the thoughts of leaving. His bags were packed and he was watching the clock tick. Sam had another thirty minutes before he’d be back but Cas was scheduled to come say goodbye any minute and it had him on edge. 

 

He didn’t want to say goodbye...his selfish side didn’t want to let Cas go but it wasn’t fair to him to make any kind of promises or give him any reason to not try to find his own happiness. He wanted to visit for Christmas, and he’d try but it was likely going to be at least nine months before they saw one another again and Cas was a catch…

 

The small knock had him climbing off the couch in a rush that nearly knocked him on his ass. He winced but didn’t let the curse fly out. “Be right there!” 

 

“Hello Dean,” Castiel said once the door was opened.  He didn’t wait until they were in the room before wrapping his arms tightly around Dean’s shoulders.  They were going to have to say goodbye soon and Castiel had been trying to prepare himself for it.  It didn’t work.  The last month and a half had been amazing.  Dean stayed true to his word in his little courtship.  Sam had teased them both but Castiel loved every second of it.  His favorite being the afternoon Dean had taken him out for a picnic.  They watched the sunset and had snuggled under an extra blanket when the stars came out.  Their conversations never once lacked and Castiel finally got his first real kiss at Pride.  When he had told Dean he’d never been to a Pride parade before, Dean had balked then made arrangements for everyone to go.  Even Sam joined in.  It had been the best day in his life for so many different reasons and it was all because of Dean.  

 

And now he had to say goodbye.  His chest squeezed painfully making him cling a little tighter, “I’m sorry but I really don’t want you to go,” he said softly.

 

“I’m not exactly eager to leave either but I really do have to, Cas...If I didn’t have to…’ Dean trailed off, it wasn’t good to make promises. It wouldn’t change anything and he knew it. “I’m gonna miss you, sweetheart but you’ve got a life here just like I’ve got one back home...don’t let this keep you down, okay?” 

 

Castiel sighed, letting go just enough to look up into Dean’s face, “I won’t.  Dean...will you...are you wanting to...you know, stay together while you’re gone?” he said.  It was the one conversation both of them refused to have but now it was a must.

“Cas I’m not...I’m not going anywhere but,” Dean tried his damndest to not to let his voice break. He wanted Cas to remember him and smile, not the memory of him having some kind of emo breakdown. “You’re a great guy and I don’t want you putting limits on yourself. I’ll understand if some other guy swoops in and steals your heart. You’re certainly worth more than what I can give you from a thousand miles away.” 

 

“Dean, stop.  Someone already swooped in and stole my heart.  He’s standing right in front of me,” Castiel said leaning up to brush their lips together, “And I’ll take whatever I can if it means I get to keep this...to keep you,” he said, pressing his head against Dean’s chest, “I only want you Dean Winchester.”

 

‘For as long as you want, Cas...you’ve got me.” Dean promised, strengthening his grip just a little as if somehow this moment wouldn’t disappear if he held on tight enough.

* * *

  
  


Castiel cleaned up his apartment for probably the fifth time that day.  Dean was going to be there any minute and he wanted everything to be perfect.  He had a surprise for Dean and he couldn’t wait to tell him!  

 

It was their two year anniversary and even though it had been insanely difficult at times being that far from each other for that long, they some how managed to make it work.  They talked on the phone almost every day and if it wasn’t the phone, they were on skype.  It wasn’t always perfect, they argued, got annoyed with each other and even had a fight.

 

That had been the worst.  Castiel always thought his insecurities were bad but Dean’s put him to shame.  While they had been skyping his new roommate had waltzed in the room in nothing but a towel.  Castiel hadn’t had a chance to tell Dean about Balthazar yet and hadn’t thought anything of it until he saw Dean’s face.  They fought and when Castiel thought it was over, it just kept going.  It went on for days.  And it didn’t help when Balthazar chose the worst times to walk in on their skype chats and just had to make some of the rudest comments in that condescending way of his.  It always resulted in the fight getting worse and Dean hanging up on him.  Every freaking time.  Castiel was so sure Dean was going to break up with him over it.  In a moment of desperation Castiel scraped all the money he had and flew to Kansas to confront Dean in person.

 

Instead of the hug he was expecting, Dean only got even angrier with him for spending his food money.  Castiel had broken down, sobbing and begging for Dean to not break up with him.  Whatever it was seemed to break through the wall Dean had put up between them.  That was the night they had sex for the first time and Castiel uttering I love you.  To his surprise, Dean said it back between kisses.

 

After that things got better.  They talked more and not just to fill the air between them.  Castiel made sure to make sure he filled Dean in on even the smallest details of his life and Dean promised to do the same for him.  Now even his boyfriend and Balthazar were getting along, playfully insulting each other as Castiel rolled his eyes fondly.

 

There was a knock on his door and he nearly tripped in his haste to get to it, “Dean!  You’re finally here!” he shouted jumping onto his boyfriend.

 

Dean picked Cas up and spun him around, it felt so damn good to have him warm, solid, in his arms again. The last two years were hell on his heart but he wouldn’t change a minute of it. Castiel was everything he could have ever wanted and he was so damn in love with the guy it was ridiculous. 

 

“Hey sweetheart,’ Dean said, smiling down at those familiar blues, before drawing him in for a kiss.

 

“Mmm, hi,” Castiel giggled, “I missed you so much.  I only feel just a tiny bit guilty that you came straight here instead of seeing Sam first,” he grinned, walking backward to pull Dean into his apartment.  He chuckled as his boyfriend snagged up his bag and shut the door on their way.

 

“And before you ask, the ‘dickface’ is gone for the weekend,” he grinned.

 

“Meh, Sammy will deal…” Dean said, pulling Cas back for another kiss. He’d missed this, the weight of Cas in his arms, the scent of his body wash, the honey from his tea that seemed to linger on his tongue. 

 

“Christmas came early, huh?” Dean teased, though he was grateful not to have to deal with Balth’s shit. There wasn’t as much animosity as before but he was still more than a little sure the asshole wanted in Cas’ pants and that would  _ never _ be okay with Dean. 

 

“Yes it did.  I threatened to burn his v neck shirts if he dared to show up here before Monday,” Castiel grinned, jumping up to wrap his legs around Dean’s waist.  He laughed brightly as Dean attacked his neck, falling down onto the couch, “God I missed you so much Dean,” Castiel groaned grabbing at Dean’s face to kiss him deeply.  Dean rolled his hips and Castiel groaned, his head tilting back as pleasure ripped through him.

 

“Wait, Dean, wait, wait,” He gasped, yanking at Dean’s hair.  He almost laughed at the angry pout he got in response, “There’s something I have to tell you.”

 

“Well that doesn’t sound ominous at all…” Dean said, backing away a little. He’d gotten comfortable in their relationship and as much as the distance felt like a drain on his soul, he was still willing to do everything he could to make it work. 

 

“Oh don’t be like that, it’s not bad,” Castiel laughed giving Dean one more kiss before pushing him off just enough to slither out from under him.  A nervous flutter wracked his belly as he reached into his backpack to retrieve the paperwork that stated he was ready to graduate that year.  There was another letter at the bottom of the stack that he was even more nervous about but he managed to reign it in enough to hand them over to Dean.

 

“Okayy,” he said hesitantly as he started reading through the documents. When he realized that Cas was on track to graduate in the summer his mouth widened into a smile. “I’m so proud of you, sweetheart.” 

 

He was instantly urged on though, a little confused as to why his pride had to take a back seat, but he continued. The skimmed the next few pages, all pretty much talking about Cas’ ridiculously high GPA, which Dean already knew about. But then when he catches the familiar letterhead, his heart seems to lodge in his throat making it nearly impossible for him to swallow.

 

_ Dear Mr. Novak, _

 

_ We are pleased to hear that you have accepted the position as one of our teaching assistants for the start of the spring semester here at Hendrix Middle School.  We were very impressed with your resume and everything that you have accomplished at Stanford University.  We are eager to meet you and get you started in early August! _

 

_ Sincerely,  _

 

_ Principal Charles Shurely   _

 

Dean’s hands were shaking as his eyes moved over the words, could this ...could it really be this easy? 

 

“You-you’re sure? I mean I’m not one to look a gift horse in the mouth here but Cas you could work  _ anywhere _ ...you could teach anywhere…” 

 

Castiel chewed on his lip and nodded, “I know but I’m tired of this long distance,” he said moving back into Dean’s space, sitting in his lap and cupping his face with his hands, “I’ll still be getting to do what I want to do, just get an added bonus of actually being within a 100 miles of you,” he laughed softly, “Is...is this okay though?  I know I didn’t ask before I sent out my resume…”

 

“Dude yes, hell yes...I just don’t want you to feel like you’re settling. I mean, it might not be easy or anything but with this much notice I could, I could probably follow you somewhere y’know...somewhere you  _ wanted  _ to go.” He hated the thought of as just settling for some hokey town middle school if he wanted bigger and better things. The guy was a genius he probably had his pick of places to teach. Dean didn’t want to be what held him back. 

 

“Don’t make me slap you Winchester.  I’m not settling for anything.  Once I’m actually ready for a teaching position we’ll talk about relocating if I have too but only if  _ both _ of us want to.  You hear me?” he said looking Dean in the eyes until his boyfriend nodded, “Good.  I love you,” he said leaning in for a kiss.

 

“I love you too,” Dean grinned, letting himself really feel like it might happen for the first time since he’d read the letter. “I gotta admit, I’m kinda glad you are okay with coming to me...I’ve just now got the kitchen the way I want it and it would suck to have to sell the place.” 

 

Castiel laughed, “I can’t wait to see it.  You’ll have to help me find an apartment when I get there,” he said as he laid back on the couch, pulling Dean on top of him.  Just having the weight of his boyfriend settling on him had him damn near purring in the back of his throat.  He missed everything with Dean but this right here was one of the most.  

 

‘Or….you could just stay with me?” he said, feeling surprisingly comfortable with the statement once it was out there. He imagined there’d be some nervousness, some hesitation but there wasn’t. He knew without a doubt that if Cas wanted it, there’s nothing Dean had that he wouldn’t share with him. 

 

Castiel’s mouth dropped open and a small laugh filtered out past his lips, “You’re serious?  Dean!” Castiel pulled Dean down and kissed him hard, fingers going through his hair to muss it up even more, “I’d love to move in with you.  Now, let’s celebrate shall we?” Castiel asked with a wicked grin.


End file.
